AWD #042: Be You
Be You
Summary: Ceres offers some words of confidence to an aspiring pilot.
Date: 17/02/2013 (OOC Date)
Related Logs: None
Ceres Kelsey 
Flight Simulators
The Air Wing has access to flight simulators to train pilots off the ground in combat maneuvers and situations that are hard to replicate with regular dogfight practicing and this is their home. A rectangular room, the hatch opens up beside the bank of computers that control the simulations and what is seen by the individuals when training sessions are in progress. The sims are actual cockpits cut out of old frames and installed here to function exactly as the real thing, right down to oxygen plugs for suits. In front of each cockpit, complete with armored glass, are LCD screens that cover most of the front view to the front and above. There are two Vipers, two Predators, and one full-cabin Raptor available.
AWD #42

Apparently fresh from a shower, Kelsey has tromped herself down the hall from her new berthings to sit with the sims. The gal looks dogged and ragged despite the shower, but she's still sitting at the computer terminal, pecking at the keyboard with the eraser of a pencil. The manual for the sims is open beside her and turned to the section about programming options. She just stares rather blankly at the screen, possibly not even looking at what is passing front of her.

Dressed in her fatigues, Redux enters the sims with a long stride and heads to sign in for her slot. SHe stops for a second and notes Kelsey, quickly scrawling her name before she flexes her hand and casts a glance over at the young woman again. "PO.." She says in light greeting before she wanders over towards her. "What are you reading?" She asks, giving her a few feet before she stops, flexing her left hand, working the scarred and burned flesh a chance to warm up.

Kelsey is not exactly dressed for success. Tanktops and gym shorts. At least she smells fresh from the shower. Peach and ..floral? -shampoo. She barely seems to notice anyone else in the room for the moment until Ceres actually gets close and asks what she's reading. Kels looks up, blinking. Yes, that's a uniformed Captain. legs are under her quickly and she stands at ease. "I'm- I, I just decided to-" blink. "-to look into the sims, sir. What kind of scenarios there are. That I could use. One day. Down the road. If I, you know, finish flight training. Sir." Frazzled, but probably not by Ceres. Its been a long day for the Petty Officer.

"Good, very good, at ease please and continue. No need." Ceres waves it off and steps in closer, getting a look. "Do you have any questions?" She offers and then watches Kelsey's reaction. "You were out there, at Aerilon, weren't you?" She studies the other woman and then eyes the sims. "Dealing with a bit of the after effects?" She offers and leans into the table a bit, getting comfortable.

"Thanks," she sighs. Kelsey flops back down into the chair, deflating. "Yeah, I've got about a billion questions." Turning back to the screen, she picks up the pencil again and swings it like a pendulum. "Is it that obvious, sir?" is asked with a bit of a cringe. "Yeah, I was. The Major has me in his backseat so I could get a feel for combat. I think he's trying to gauge whether or not he's wasting his time teaching me, sir." Kels swallows and slowly turns her eyes to Ceres. "Sir, I know you're busy but- basic flight is also OCS for me. Can I ask you some stuff?" 'Stuff' is likely KelseyKode for 'Personal Questions'.

A sympathetic look, one of understanding settles across her features. "I am not sure its that. Maybe he wants you to see exactly what action is up front and in your face. He needs you to adjust. Many of us never saw real combat until war day. Its not easy." She admits and then folds her arms, tilting her head as she smiles giving her a nod. "This my sim time, need to make sure my hand is up to snuff but I can answer questions," pause, "Go ahead …what you got?" She asks. A motion is made with her good hand towards the book, possibly not realizing its personal.

Kels makes a face and looks back to the screen. "It scared the shit out of me at first, sir. All I could think about was how badly I wanted out of the cockpit. I wanted to come back to the ship. Get my daughter and hide." She blows out a breath, tossing a loose strand of hair up and over. "But I got back here and saw how excited everyone was. The reactions. The energy. Started thinking about how you all go out and do this all the time. Gods, talk about embarrassed, sir. It.. was eye opening." And here she is, in the sims. She's not running to hide. But being as tired as she is, her brain lapses and it takes her a moment to find focus. "Sir, I wanted to ask how you find that balance as an officer? You also seem so put together. Especially recently. On the Deck, we talk about the pilots a lot. Who is who. A lot of people down there respect you because you don't yell or cause a scene. So far I get a lot of talk about how I need to find my own style of leadership. That, honestly, doesn't help me. Only thing I ever lead in my life was as co-captain of the JV cheerleading team in high school." She's probably not considering her small team on the deck to be leadership, though.

"Its the adrenaline rush after, PO. Its the thrill of being alive after staring death in the face. Its knowing you did something. Its damn scary and each of us is scared no matter what face we put on it. But we do it, because its what we are damn good at." Ceres say sand nods to her. But she stops as she realizes she is being talked about and her smile fades. "I see…I did not realize we were talked about like that." she says. "I lost it when Aios died…I was. Loss is a hard thing but everyone has what they need to do, yelling doesn't get it done any faster." She smiles a bit and shakes her head. "You be you. THat has seemed to have gotten you a lot of admirers. Just always know that every action you take affects others everywhere. We are a ship, a crew and when you do something, everyone else adjusts to it or has to deal. I think you are doing just fine…you don't need to find anything."

Kelsey stares. "You guys are scared every time you go out to fight?" She looks incredulous. "Oh my Gods." The sort of just rocked her world. Kels sits back in the chair and leaves the pencil on the desk in front of her. "I thought you were all like these superhuman machines like Cylons or something. Braver by some umpteenth degree or maybe just have something I don't have." Her eyes lift to stare at the sims. The rest has her fall silent and she looks over to Ceres. There's a small smile there. "Thank you," she whispers with probably more emotion than she intended, but there is a lot there. Ceres can probably see it in the PO's eyes. That little bit of advice just changed an outlook and maybe a life.

"We don't fly because we are superhuman, we fly because we are good at it and we want revenge. We want to make a difference…we do. Even if it just a punch here or there. You keep this up, studying, putting your head down and grinding your way through this? You will have the support of the Wing. If this si something you want, Kelsey. You do it. The rest falls into place. There is nothing to being a pilot other than honing your skill. You earn respect when you walk onto that deck and put your life on the line in that bird. That is what makes you a hero…is the attempt." She says and taps her finger to the table. "Its not easy…but you don't walk this road alone." She tells her, offering the young woman a smile and then hesitantly reaches out to grasp her shoulder, giving it a squeeze. "You got questions..you ask them."

Kelsey plays with the hem of her shirt, looking down at it while she listens to Ceres. "Agrippa chased me down earlier to thank me for getting involved in the fight the other night when this group of deckhands came after Phin. He said I'd already learned the most important lesson of the wing: never abandon your wingman." She cockeyes a smile lightly. "As sort of a solitary person that I am, I don't like being alone. Signing up for this cruise was the hardest thing I ever had to talk myself into. I don't know anyone. I like that you all sort of accepted me right off the bat. It meant a lot more than I think anyone knew, sir. I want to make that difference for a lot of reason, but part of it is that I don't want to let you all down." A quiet admission. The combat today is really weighing heavily on her. She reaches up to grab the hand and give it a squeeze before it falls back. More questions. Kelsey is 20 and more of an adult than several Ensigns. She's got more questions than the night has minutes for.

"YOu can't be solitary on a ship, you have to adjust. I am the same way…you can keep to yourself but out there? Out there you are a unit. You work together and we are only as strong as our weakest link. Which is why we are here for you. We want to see you succeed. You succeed, we all succeed. Its never failure, it is our oversight in not giving you the help you need. So don't ever hesitate, we stand together and that is likely why different portions of the military never always quite get along." There is a growing smile and she pulls her hand back quickly after the squeeze. A moment of wonder crosses her face.

Kelsey looks down at the hem of her shirt, turning it round and round her fingertip. She hears this all and her face slowly reddens and glassy eyes finally look back up to Ceres and she holds the very simple, hopeful smile. She tries to say something and just finds herself unable to really find anything. False starts cross her for several seconds before she looks back down to the stitching and she sniffs once. "Dare to hope, Kelsey," she tells herself in a whisper.

Watching Kelsey as she seems to work herself over trying to reply, Ceres doesn't prod. "Dare to do…Kelsey Wescott. I look forward to see the rank of ensign on your uniforms." She says and starts to push off the table. "I got a quick date with a sim, feel free to watch. I need to work on my hand. Put on a headset, ask questions. I will answer them as I go and then we can grab something to eat after." She tells the young woman. "Sound good? That is if I can tear you away from your book." A wink before she attempts to pat her shoulder again. "People see something in you Kelsey, don't ever question that. Seize it."

Kelsey finally looks back at the invitation to watch and ask. She has the same glassy look. Ceres really struck something in this nugget. "I can be torn away, sir. Thank you." The last just has her nod a few times and she looks back down for the moment. She can wait until Ceres turns to wipe an eye quickly.

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